i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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