I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I love you. Go after that dick
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize