its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
