walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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