we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
