you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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