Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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