The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize