Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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