Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Randomize
