I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
where does the pee come out of this thing
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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