So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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