He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
