That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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