who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I think my vagina is haunted
im about as happy as oj after his trial
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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