you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
