Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
