i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize