he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
