I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
