It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
