I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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