Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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