Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Randomize
