dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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