You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize