weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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