I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I just made out with a guy for $7.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
