Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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