he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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