Christians are straight up FREAKS
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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