In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I am naked and annoyed.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
