11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
