He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Randomize
