office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
