i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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