No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
