Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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