I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
The power of my boobs compel you
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
