This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
