Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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