Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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