He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
