just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
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