now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
