Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize