Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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