Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
