question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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