Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
