I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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