I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
A+ Viking dick
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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