I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize
